BAH HUMBUG

Pardon me while I vomit. Thanks for this Pam, are you sure that's not your car?

BITE ME

Call me crazy, but I think 69¢ for a pre-bitten Creepy Santa chocolate pop is a little overpriced.

After I pointed it out to the cashier, she said thanks and left it there. I really hope someone bought it.

JUST WHAT YOU ALWAYS NEEDED

In case you can't read what's on the this... thing:

Smencils - Gourmet SCENTED Pencils

This one was orange. Thanks Toys R Us.

HAND JOB

Oh, you want a manicure? Just have a seat here in my penis-hand chair and I'll get right to you.

CRITTER CONGA

There's nothing like turning into an aisle and seeing a pride of angry cheetahs ready to rip your face off. I especially hate the disembodied ringleader on the top.

MAGIC CARPET

Calgary. 07:45 ish. Good time to drive around with a roll of carpet hanging out the unsecured doors of your van. And yes, I was the epitome of safety when I was taking pictures of things instead of paying attention to the road.

WHAT COULD I POSSIBLY SAY?

Thanks Ben.

TASTY

Quality Cock Soup since 1922. Thanks CMcK.